And has a bubble burst? of course! Now, that doesn’t mean you can’t stay happily or madly in love and that person becomes your best friend and partner. These bubbles usually occur during the first 1-3 months of a new relationship.
But here are the mistakes to avoid along the way:
1. Getting to know everyone in the first month or two
It could be your kids, your parents, college or a family reunion. It’s too early. And how about a broad introduction on Facebook or other social media announcing that you are in a relationship? Ah-ah.
2. Forget your friends
Remember just a month ago you had weekly company lunches? Monthly book clubs? Now, I’m not picking on anyone here, but this tends to be more of a female issue when starting a new relationship — and I’m not into gender stereotyping, but does he give up his weekly tennis, golf, basketball games to spend 100% of his time with you?
3. You are not hiring an executive
Where do you see yourself in 5 years, 10 years? Probing questions are for headhunting, but not for you in the first month or two of dating. (We know what you’re really asking: Do you see yourself with me? It reeks of desperation).
4. It’s not a matter of getting there
…. It’s about the journey, just like in life. Okay, let’s use a real journey. You planned a trip to Istanbul. You bought Turkish Air business class tickets. You can walk in their famous airport lounge full of treats and delights. You shop at the Grand Bazaar. You’re drinking a four-season drink that’s been a prison for centuries. You have delicious spa treatments in the hammam. So what’s the best part? Everything, including the journey. Just like dating, it’s not the destination but the whole process of getting there, getting to know someone, over time.
5. Honesty in the bedroom
Intimacy is a big part of love. Maybe your past relationships were lacking in this department. Be communicative right from the start — what you enjoy, what you would like to try. when you are ready But don’t bring past baggage into the bedroom—this is a fresh start with a partner who may be long-term for you!
6. Getting along because you don’t want to be alone
Trust me, you’ll be even lonelier. This doesn’t mean a long and rigid list either, but it has to be someone you share common values with, communicate well with and can compromise on a daily basis.
7. Gives them a key
…. too early. What is too early? Probably a few weeks. After that, it is different for each couple. Just based on what I’ve heard and observed over 25 years as a dating coach, it’s usually around 3-6 months.
So, if you need relationship or dating coaching, give me a call. That’s what I do. This is what I like. helping people. Be an objective person to bounce ideas off. Last night a client called that I hadn’t heard from in a year (I knew he was in a serious relationship). He scheduled the call with me last week and I was totally curious as to what he wanted to talk about.
Yes, he’s still in a seriously happy relationship, but just like everyone else, every now and then you disagree. So what we talked about was nothing I’d ever talked about before—but he came away happy, as I was. Sometimes a disinterested outsider is just what you need!
Keep smiling—it only takes one.
with love,
Andrea McGinty helps you date efficiently and effectively
https://www.33000dates.com 702-494-7344