It’s exciting to meet someone you want to connect with, and it’s easy to get caught up in wanting someone to like you so much that you just stick to superficial conversations. These kinds of conversations can only lead to superficial connections and situations.
Being more intentional and asking deeper questions is essential to arm yourself with knowledge and create a more meaningful connection. In this blog, I share the top 5 questions you should ask on the first three dates.
Question #1: What are your core values and beliefs?
In any relationship, understanding each other’s core values and beliefs is essential. Asking a potential date about their basic beliefs and priorities in life can give you tremendous insight into whether their values align with yours.
It is important to consider what is most important to both of you and if you share a similar vision and life goals. Knowing this information in advance can help you avoid disappointments in the future and help you build a connection that will last.
It may feel scary and vulnerable to ask deeper questions, but in reality, these questions build intimacy and shared connection.
Question #2: What is the relationship you want?
It is important to clarify what kind of relationship they are looking for: is it a casual dating experience or something serious.
Most singles are too afraid to seem desperate or too much and avoid the question altogether. Avoiding asking deeper questions can be a big mistake, as you may enter the relationship without understanding the person’s intent. I’ve had clients tell me they’ve been with someone for several years and found out the person never wanted to get married.
Asking them what kind of relationship they want not only makes your intentions clear but also shows that you value their time and emotional investment. It’s easy to fall into the trap of mismatched expectations, which leads to disappointment and heartbreak. By having an open and honest conversation early on, both parties can have a clear understanding and enjoy the experience for what it is.
Having trouble getting into the depth of the conversation that might require these questions? Check out this video!
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Question #3: How do you handle conflict?
You might be thinking, is this too serious a question to ask in the early stages of dating? definitely not! A person who has good conflict resolution skills will be able to answer the question confidently. Someone who avoids answering the question completely tells you that they may need work in this area.
Conflict is an inevitable aspect of any relationship, but navigating it with your partner can make all the difference. It’s not just love that keeps a couple together; This is how they fight and solve their problems. Understanding how your partner handles conflict can be the key to solving any problems that may arise in the future.
Maybe they prefer to talk about things in a calm and logical way, or maybe they need time to cool down before addressing the matter. Regardless of their approach, it is important to listen to them and try to see things from their point of view. Learning to deal with conflicts together can strengthen your relationship and create a stronger and more lasting bond.
Question #4: What is your communication style?
Communication plays a crucial role in any relationship, and understanding each other’s preferred communication style can make all the difference. Some people like to communicate through words, while others prefer non-verbal cues.
Awareness of these differences can help ensure that both partners feel heard and respected when discussing important matters. Empathy is also an essential aspect of effective communication.
It involves understanding and being sensitive to each other’s feelings and perspectives. By empathizing with each other, the couple can build trust and strengthen their relationship. Ultimately, developing a communication style that works for both people is the key to building a healthy and fulfilling relationship.
Question #5: What are the green and red flags you look for in a relationship?
This powerful question gives insight into someone’s boundaries and what they require to make them happy in a relationship. If you ask this question, be prepared to have the question thrown back at you.
Getting to know a person’s needs and boundaries is the key to understanding their belief system and how they act in a relationship. You might learn that they enjoy acts of service as a love language, or they might find someone who doesn’t ask red flag questions.
Understanding each other’s needs and requirements will help you learn how to make each other happy and foster a happy relationship.
Building relationships is a delicate process that requires open dialogue and understanding the emotional needs of both sides; Take it slow and cherish the journey. Remember that relationships should bring joy and harmony into our lives – be sure to pay attention to how you feel in any given interaction.
After all, it’s important to treat ourselves with respect and compassion as you go through this process, don’t be afraid to own your truth and ask the deeper questions. I promise in the end, it will foster the deeper connection you want with the right person.
If you struggle with being vulnerable and asking deeper questions, I’m here to help. Schedule a free relationship readiness review with me Here.