It’s no secret that we’re fans of dating apps here at Dates & Mates. But if you’re craving some solid tips on how to date IRL, there are a few Do’s and don’ts That will help you make a match the next time you are at a bachelor party. Demona was an integral part of the launch of the Match app’s live singles event series Stir. In the process, Demona did field research—she watched trends and then asked dates what they were looking for, what their biggest annoyances were, and what would particularly grab their attention at a mixer.
The DO’s
- Get close to them – Most people will be impressed that you have the courage to talk to them first. And everyone is there to meet new people, so what’s the worst that can happen? You don’t need a bold opening at an event intended for singles to meet. A simple, “Hi, my name is ___, what’s yours?” I’ll do.
- give them the “signals” – If you like them, be sure to set it up: smile, make eye contact and even use an appropriate casual touch like a playful pat on the arm to indicate interest. . Kindness, compliments and laughter will also get you much further at a singles event than snarky, self-deprecating comments or being ignored (when pick-up artists put someone down to get their attention)
- Be accessible – Many times we feel the need to run to the tables and plant ourselves so that we don’t have to stand around and feel awkward. But if you take a turn every 20-30 minutes, you might catch the eye of someone you didn’t notice at first.
- Clear tracking– The norm has become “we should hang out again” or “I’ll text you” and we never do. So even the slightest measure of clarity and follow through will give you an edge when meeting new people. Make a specific plan to text, call or go out and then keep that promise.
the forbidden
- Crowding around the “hot girl/guy” – by all means, try to attract their attention; But that doesn’t mean ignoring all potential matches for now. Just because they’re all vying for your attention doesn’t mean they’re the best match for you.
- Getting lost in your group — It’s common for people to attend singles mixers with friends, but remember that you’re there to meet potential matches. If you’re not ready to fly solo, that’s totally fine. Try to make an agreement with your friends to split up for a large part of the party and meet new people
- Dress casually – Most of the time, the people who really “show up” in their appearance leave with the most interest. People at the mixer will notice when you put even a little effort into how you look. A sexy pair of shoes, a shorter skirt or a sharp jacket can make all the difference in catching someone’s eye and showing that you’ve dressed to impress.
- to be rude or disparaging – If someone works up the courage to talk to you, don’t roll your eyes and don’t dismiss them right away. Not only is this bad dating karma, but you may also unintentionally turn off someone else who has considered reaching out to you but doesn’t want to be dumped like the last person.
Navigating the singles mixer is an art that you can hone with every event you attend. So just like going to the gym, when you stay motivated, consistent, and positive, you’ll get the results you’re looking for and master how to date IRL in no time.
